when i wake up
i close my eyes
am i dead?
i ask myself quietly
im asleep on the inside
funny how a moment
can feel like forever
my heart is beating
outside of my chest
i stare from the inside out
all i see is black
as i imagine my life
but imagining will be
the death of me
tick
tock
this alarm is my prison
its time to start the day
play pretend
wake up
its almost time for my entrance
give me an oscar
this is the performance of a lifetime
but no one knows
its tucked inside my heart
the little secret only i know
im the only one on earth
what if i don't get up
what if i just fade
like nothing memorable
except maybe to a few
the lies we tell ourselves
might as will be real
no ones gonna save me
but
what
do
you
do
when
you
dont
want
to
be
saved?
i cant explain this darkness
i am possessed
i tell myself
there must be something
wrong with me
but only i can see
i revel in this pain
strength is what i need to breathe
my heart overflows
with years of broken dreams
i walk a mile
just to stand up
just to wake up
just to do it again
over and over again
until when?
i do this to myself
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